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You Know You've Been Hacking Too Long When... 

...you want an elevator to the basement and begin looking for the "0" key,
because 0 is less than 1.

...you are afraid to hit the snooze bar on your alarm clock too many times
because you think that the clock's subroutine is mallocing memory each time it
goes to print the free memory on the front, and soon it would run out.

...you look for your toothbrush by trying to do a '/tooth<tab>' command.

...you're writing a homework assignment, and get to the end of the line in the
middle of a sentence, tack on a '\', and continue writing on the next line.

...you have two books, one on top of another, and think: "No problem. I'll
just click on its title bar to raise the other book to the front."

...you hit the wrong key on the elevator keypad and you feel frustrated when
you see that it has no "Undo" key.

...you start typing semi-colons at the end of sentences instead of full stops;

...you see something written on the blackboard and think: "Why don't I just
log on and download it?"

...you think you can't wake up in the morning because you forgot to push a
return address on the stack the night before.

...you plan a hectic day as follows: "My load average seems to be a bit too
high, my scheduler might die any moment, and I'm running out of swap space...
I'd better kill off some low-priority user processes."

...you are reading a book and look for the space bar to get to the next page.

...you are watching TV and look for the "Info" key in the remote control to
find out the name of the program.

...you want to 'grep keys /dev/pockets'.

...after fooling around all day with routers and other junk, you pick up the
phone and start dialing an IP number.

...you get in an elevator and double-press the button for the floor you want.

...you go to the movies and catch yourself wondering what the color depth of
the screen image is.

...you see a flock of birds, and you sit there and try to figure out the
algorithms that determine their movement.

...not only do you check your e-mail more often than your paper mail, but you
remember your network address faster than your postal one.

...you go to balance your checkbook and discover that you're doing the math in
hexadecimal.

...your computers have a higher street value than your car.

...in your universe, "round numbers" are powers of 2, not 10.

...your alarm clock goes off, and you think it is spawning new alarm clock
processes and you have to kill them quickly so it doesn't fill up the process
table and prevent you from doing anything about it. The only problem is, there
is a monitor process that you can't kill, and every time you kill off one of
the ring_alarm(x) processes, it waits 9 minutes and spawns another one.

...you wish you could 'sleep 24000 &'.

...you try to bring a window to the front of something, then you realize that
the "something" is a post-it (tm) on your screen.

...you've been low-level debugging ethernets for a week and when you see two
people at a table trying to pick up the same jar of butter you wonder if they
are using the correct CSMA/CD algorithm to avoid a re-collision.



I found this at http://albrecht.ecn.purdue.edu/~taylor/humor/hack.html
and took out those that I did not consider funny. :-)

toptop

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